Have you ever thought of why people of average intelligence outperform people with the highest levels of intelligence majority of the time?
Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the capacity of recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, for managing emotions in ourselves as well as in our relationships.
EQ is critical to managing your behaviour, moving smoothly through social situations and making critical choices in life.
Emotional Intelligence (EQ), Intelligence (IQ), & Personality
Why is EQ important? Why we need to understand it and why it is the most sought after training topic today especially at the Leadership level.
Emotional intelligence is important in leadership because it improves self-awareness, increases accountability, fosters communication, and builds trusting relationships by helping leaders process their emotions in a more positive way that allows them to address challenges more effectively.
The technical skills that helped secure someone first promotion might not guarantee his or her next. If they aspire to be in a leadership role, there’s an emotional element they need to consider. It’s what helps people successfully coach teams, manage stress, deliver feedback, and collaborate with others.
It’s called emotional intelligence, and accounts for nearly 90 percent of what sets high performers apart from peers with similar technical skills and knowledge.
What exactly is Emotional Intelligence, let me try to explain in brief.
EQ is the pattern of how people’s biases in their thinking leads them to think one thing or choice is better than another, as well as their clarity in differentiating within those biases to exercise clear and sound judgment.
| What I See | What I do | |
| Personal Competence | Self-Awareness | Self-Management |
| Social Competence | Social Awareness | Relationship Management |
Emotional Intelligence Framework
- The Intrapersonal Realm
- The Interpersonal Realm
- The Adaptability Realm
- The Stress Management Realm
- The General Mood Realm
Intrapersonal Realm
The Intrapersonal Realm concerns your ability to know and manage yourself. It embraces:
- Self-Awareness
- Assertiveness
- Independence
- Self-Regard
- Self-Actualization
Self-Awareness: The ability to recognize how you’re feeling and why you’re feeling that way and the impact your behaviour has on others
Assertiveness: The ability to clearly express your thoughts and feelings, stand your ground and defend a position
Independence: The ability to be self-directed and self-controlled in your thinking and actions and to be free of emotional dependency. Independent people are self-reliant in planning and making important decisions.
Self-Regard: The ability to appreciate your perceived positive aspects and possibilities as well as to accept your negative aspects and limitations and still feel good about yourself
Self – Actualization: The ability to realize your potential. This component of emotional intelligence is manifested by becoming involved in pursuits that lead to a meaningful, rich and full life.
Inter-personal Realm
The Inter-personal Realm concerns your “people skills” — your ability to interact and get along with others. It is composed of three scales.
Empathy: The ability to understand what others might be feeling and thinking. It is the ability to view the world through another person’s eyes.
Social Responsibility: The ability to demonstrate that you are a cooperative, contributing and constructive member of your social group.
Interpersonal Relationship: The ability to forge and maintain relationships that are mutually beneficial and marked by give-and take and a sense of emotional closeness.
Adaptability Realm
The Adaptability Realm involves your ability to be flexible and realistic, and to solve a range of problems as they arise. Its three scales are:
Reality Testing: The ability to assess the correspondence between what’s experienced and what objectively exists. It is the capacity to see things objectively, the way they are, rather than the way we wish or fear them to be.
Flexibility: The ability to adjust your emotions, thoughts and behaviour to changing situations and conditions. This component of emotional intelligence applies to your overall ability to adapt to unfamiliar, unpredictable and dynamic circumstances
Problem Solving: The ability to identify and define problems as well as to generate and implement potentially effective solutions.
Stress Management Realm
The Stress Management Realm concerns your ability to tolerate stress and control impulses. Its two scales are:
Stress Tolerance: The ability to withstand adverse events and stressful situations without falling apart by actively and positively coping with stress. Stress tolerance includes having a repertoire of suitable responses to stressful situations. It is associated with the capacity to be relaxed and composed and to calmly face difficulties without getting carried away by strong emotions.
Impulse Control: The ability to resist or delay an impulse, drive or temptation to act. Impulse control entails a capacity for accepting your aggressive impulses, being composed, and controlling aggression, hostility and irresponsible behaviour.
General Mood Realm
The General Mood Realm concerns your outlook on life, your ability to enjoy yourself and others and your overall feelings of contentment or dissatisfaction. It has two dimensions.
Happiness: The ability to feel satisfied with your life, to enjoy yourself and others and to have fun. Happiness combines self-satisfaction, general contentment and the ability to enjoy life. Happiness is associated with a general feeling of cheerfulness and enthusiasm. It is a by-product and/or barometric indicator of your overall degree of emotional intelligence and emotional functioning.
Optimism: The ability to look at the brighter side of life and to maintain a positive attitude even in the face of adversity. Optimism assumes a measure of hope in one’s approach to life Emotional Intelligence.
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